{"id":42,"date":"2012-10-22T20:11:16","date_gmt":"2012-10-22T20:11:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.trich.me\/blog\/?p=42"},"modified":"2014-06-18T15:59:13","modified_gmt":"2014-06-18T15:59:13","slug":"my-exercising","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.trich.me\/blog\/my-exercising\/","title":{"rendered":"Bro…protein…Bro, bro workout bro. Yeah bro"},"content":{"rendered":"

Today was day 1 of \u2018lose-fat-so-I-can-be-magical-at-basketball-and-shred-up-because-I\u2019m-fat-and-if-I-go-to-cancun-in-november-like-this-I\u2019m-going-to-embarrass-my-mom\u2019 exercise\/diet plan.<\/p>\n

I know you\u2019re thinking\u2026men don\u2019t think like this. Not true. We worry, its just not how skinny we are, it\u2019s how jacked we are. But there are a few reasons why I feel like I need to hit the gym harder and eat better.<\/p>\n

1) Facebook ruins lives. I\u2019m not talking romantic or relationship lives. I\u2019m talking my personal appearance life. Other people posting pictures of you on Facebook should be banned and illegal. I\u2019m glad my 1,154 friends all get to see me caught in some candid and I seriously look like the 65 year old Hulk Hogan post-steroids. The brownies in my hand weren\u2019t a nice touch either.<\/p>\n

2) I went to Wal-Mart, last night at 1 a.m., and while my wife was grabbing what we went there for, I decided to go browse for things that we didn\u2019t go there for. I saw a shirt and I was like, I want it. I realized that the clothing there is sized like way big so you feel like super skinny, when really they are just sizing things for the majority of fat Americans. So when I am an XL in the fat America sizes, that\u2019s when my huge lard signal went off.<\/p>\n

3) When your spouse learns how to shake things and pull on things to watch them move around, that\u2019s a good lard signal. And then they start to shake other parts. And then it keeps shaking for a good 2-3 rotations simply from your spouse\u2019s initial force. I admit, it\u2019s fun, but man I feel like Bruce from the movie Matilda.<\/p>\n

So that\u2019s where I drew the line. I knew I needed to get back to working out like I did 3 years ago. And I wanted to shake things up. So I wanted to do p90x. I mean I could do that right? I see all the fat people on TV turn to shreds. But I always came up with excuses of why not to do p90x like: I have a cold, I feel like it\u2019s Monday, I am sooo behind on walking dead, or my wife is on her period.<\/p>\n

So I bailed on p90x. I took the next best route. I decided on some other workout motivation. It\u2019s called caffeine. There are some pre-workout supplements that just get you going. Some stuff called JACK3D<\/a> I use is great, and that name alone sold me on it. Not to mention its said “get this now, it’s discontinued, buy quick”. So I just obeyed.<\/p>\n

But here\u2019s the thing. Working out is not the same as a few years ago. Life is different now. I can\u2019t spend 2 hours at the gym and eat a bag of nuts all day. I used to go balls to the wall because I wanted to see results and see them fast. I was on the hunt. I\u2019m talking lifting super hard and super fast. My body is just not the same anymore. My expectations are too high. As I\u2019m writing this I\u2019m like, \u201cI WORKED OUT THIS MORNING MY BICEPS SHOULD BE POPPING OUT OF THIS SHIRT\u201d. I have to coop with reality.<\/p>\n

So here\u2019s the plan. There is no plan. Well, I guess there is sort of a plan. Just keep going and give the gym an honest go. No more going to the gym, shooting around a basketball, and calling it good. Oh, and I\u2019m going to start saying bro a lot more and go tanning at least 3 times a week, that should do the trick, right? I\u2019m also not going to weigh myself because the scale is *clearly* an evil liar. Plus guys like to have weight. Fact – muscle weighs more than fat.<\/p>\n

The goal is before cancun in November. So I have a little more than a month. It\u2019s short but possible.<\/p>\n

Peace. I have to go squeeze my fat in the mirror now to get more motivation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today was day 1 of \u2018lose-fat-so-I-can-be-magical-at-basketball-and-shred-up-because-I\u2019m-fat-and-if-I-go-to-cancun-in-november-like-this-I\u2019m-going-to-embarrass-my-mom\u2019 exercise\/diet plan. I know you\u2019re thinking\u2026men don\u2019t think like this. Not true. We worry, its just not how skinny we are, it\u2019s how jacked we are. But there are a few reasons why I … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-42","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-exercise","category-health"],"yoast_head":"\nBro...protein...Bro, bro workout bro. 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